Everyone I dated asked me to marry them, eventually I learned to say,”No”, then Bill came along! Husband number three, we met when I was 27 and he was 22. For 10 years I said no when asked to marry him, then one day I wanted babies and everything changed. We married April 1991 and I became ‘Mom” of my first boy when Addison John was born Sept. 1992.
I prayed to God for boys! The daughter of two creatives, I had a pervasive and unrelenting natural curiosity that landed me in trouble! As a parent looking back on some of my crazier stunts I worried about paybacks and did not want a girl. June 5th 1997 Hunter came screaming into our lives and I could not have been happier. Now a mom to two boys I remember feeling a sense of relief knowing at age 42 I was done, and I had my boys.
Many times friends asked, “Aren’t you going to try for a baby girl?” Or hear, “Two boys, wow, bet that’s a handful, don’t you want a baby girl?” I never gave it much thought until I ran across this quote: “A son is your son until he takes him a wife. A daughter is your daughter for the rest of your life.” OK, wait, worry started to creep in, I knew I was their best girl, but what about later? Will my boys stay in my life?
Mom of Boys | THANKS mom vs are you serious?
When I was pregnant a friend explained the difference between boys and girls to me. She had one of both and said, “When you get up in the morning and make a special breakfast for your kids, your son will come into the kitchen and say, “Wow, thanks mom! This is great!” as he sits down to eat. When your daughter comes in, she will roll her eyes, huff and puff about how stupid you are because certainly you remember she is trying to lose weight! She won’t touch any food, grab a water bottle and head out the door, as your son says, “Don’t worry about it mom.” I thought, so, OK, that’s great when your boys live with you, but what about when they move on? Should I be worried, did I do enough to cement a lasting relationship?
A tomboy growing up I had fun getting down and dirty with my boys, fishing, camping, hiking, and getting messy as I revealed this crazy, beautiful world to them. I loved being the mom to two young boys! I worked hard teaching them about love, relationships, the importance of caring for others, how to handle crisis and solve problems. As close as we were was I doomed to lose them forever, just because they were boys?
Back to my husband Bill, he is my game changer He sets a good example for my boys daily: Bill calls his mother every single night, without fail. He has for years! To this day, with extreme joy, she brags to her friends about how her son calls her every night to share his day with her and ask her about hers. Bill shows our boys how to let your mom know you care. as a mom of boys Bill gives me hope that I will be in their lives forever.
I loved being my boys favorite girl, I enjoyed listening to them: helping them after school, teaching them, guiding them. We planned grand adventures and explored new things. I enjoyed showing them the world. Now they are grown, and I am no longer their favorite girl. AJ is 23 and Hunter 18; gaining independence, they are finding their way in the world focusing on girlfriends, friends, their jobs, college and a myriad of responsibilities. Me, I pray for their success, proud of their accomplishments, hopeful I did my ‘Mom’ job well.
Reflection on my Mom, mother of a boy.
I watched my brother pull away from my mom after high-school; married and divorced he never had kids and never draw back to her. As she lingered 10 days in ICU following an auto accident he visited once after that first night. A heartbroken witness, I grew up watching my mom live and breathe for her son, he was her favorite, she did not hide the fact, she loved him more than anything. Sitting by her bed, as she slowly passed from this world I began to understand the years of depression she suffered. I wondered if maybe I tried to be closer, if it would have helped, knowing it wouldn’t, it was all about her son for my mom. I wondered if having kids of your own makes you remember the special relationship you had with your ‘first girl’ when faced with being a parent yourself. Maybe if he’d had kids he would have drawn back to her, I will never know, but I wonder.
So, my boys are in their ‘independent stage’, they do not need me as often so we do not communicate like we did before, but there are moments! When I get a text message from my 23-year-old boy and he uses the ‘M’ word, “Mommy” or “Momma” my heart melts and I stop worrying, confident that though we aren’t speaking every day, YET, the bond I created is still there, it’s not broken.
I am confident my boys will always be in my life….. that the quote, it’s wrong! Just like girls, sons can be your sons for the rest of your life if you nurture them as young boys. It sets them up for relationship building in all areas of their lives and creates a bond you can count on.
Mother of all boys, yes, I’d say I am blessed!
A favorite blog of mine as a mom of boys is The MOB Society. Their mission is to equip and encourage moms of boys to raise godly men. They are a community of BoyMoms, learning to delight in the chaos of raising boys along the journey we call life! I encourage you to bookmark their blog if you too are a mom of boys, it will keep you informed and giggling as they inspire, motivate, and provide practical tools to make raising your boys a little easier!
Congratulations on being a mom of boys where it’s more THANKS Mom vs Are You Serious? I look forward to reading your comments below and hope you enjoyed reading: Mom of Boys | THANKS Mom vs Are you Serious? Please share with your friends on social media, sharing is caring!
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